What makes you happy?!

For me it's

Love 

I loved someone once before, when I was young. What we had to start with was magical. 

When we were apart, I was so excited to see him again, I cried when we had to say goodbye, I drove 2.5 hours to spend the night in his arms and then left at the crack of dawn to make it back in time for work. 

We decided to live together after 3 months of being a couple - we'd known each other already for 6 years. Two and a half years later, he left for San Fran to chase his dreams and I stayed behind trying to find mine. 

I loved him as best I knew how but times were not always great. We hurt each other through our words, I expected a lot from him and in turn he urged me to be a more ambitious person, eventually he fell out of love with me.

It took a long time for my heart to heal after that and I found myself drawn to someone completely different. He made me laugh and opened me up again. I started to think about a future with someone again, wanted to support someone emotionally, to feel trusted and intimate. 

However, he wasn't quite ready for that. At least, not with me. Yeah, that hurt but I was quite thankful to him for it because it just proved that I could and would love again. 

After that, I stopped looking for love. I needed a break from it to allow my wounded heart to mend. But it wasn't long before I started seeing someone. 

He was lovely. Nothing like the first, and absolutely nothing like the second. We had a laugh, there was obviously chemistry between us, he was easy to talk to and he made it clear that he felt the same ease around me. We were happy just being 'friends'. 

Before I knew it, I started to really like him. I wanted to spend more time with him, share more of myself with him - after 3 months I confessed to my bestie (best friend) I wanted more from him - but I fought it a little while longer because I wasn't sure I was emotionally ready to try again. 

Eventually I told him what I wanted, a boyfriend - eek, and he wasn't keen. Ha ha. Like me, he wasn't sure he was ready. I wasn't upset, a little disappointed I guess but you can't help how you feel. I thought that was it but he still wanted to see me so we agreed to just take it a day at a time. 

Six hundred and ninety days later, we've lived together for fifteen months and are still going strong. He makes me a better person. I love being in his company and he has me in frequent fits of laughter. Even when he's 10,263 miles away, he still manages to make me smile. 

But you don't have to be in love to be happy. This is just what makes me happy today. Most other days, it's chocolate ;) 

WHOOP! HAPPY FRIDAY PEOPLE