Glutton for punishment

I tried my best. No one can say that I didn't try because I really DID. I have no shoulda, woulda, coulda's left. He's looking for the chance to find true love, something I apparently cannot offer. I can only offer REAL love and that's just not enough for him. But I understand that this isn't about me, it's about him and how he feels and that's nothing I can influence or control.

C'est la vie

So, I'm going to have to pack up all the memories, the good feelings I had for him, the in-jokes and intimate thoughts. They'll all go in an archive box to be stored in the shadowed regions of my heart for a while. When I'm strong enough, I may take it out every once and a while to remind myself about the good times but that won't be for a few months yet.

It's sad, I'm not going to lie, and it's hard. Who really wants to know that you're not enough for someone to love?! However, he answered my questions - in a vague, contradictory way - but his overall message was clear:

Move on and don't look back. 

I'm not down on myself though, not this time. I'm just sad, because I thought we had something really great.

Friends think that he'll regret it, but I don't. Even years down the line, if he's still looking, he won't regret this decision. And hopefully one day soon, I won't even care if he does or doesn't.

I'm literally speechless now. I'll never be able to convey just how perfect I felt we were, and I wasn't the only one who thought so, but there you go… you can never guarantee how things work out and if that's true about anything, it's LOVE.

Goodbye you - I hope that one day you fully understand just how much you gave up but that you can look back and it still warms your heart to know you were loved SO much x