What lifts you from your depths of dispair? Your partner, your friends, your child/children, your family?
I've needed my immediate family to just give a s**t for the last 3 weeks and all I've experienced is silence.
I don't know why it still surprises me or hurts me but it definitely does, and it hurts more when I notice that people I don't know as well pay me more attention.
I've grown so tired of expecting ANYTHING from them, emotionally tired.
I've needed to be held, to be told that everything is going to be alright by someone who truly loves me. But I think that I've reached the point where even if I received it from them I wouldn't believe and couldn't trust it.
It's a sad state of affairs when your housemates of less than a year feel more like family than your own flesh and blood.
If I ever end up having a family of my own, I'm scared I'll be one of those mothers who smother because right now I feel isolated and alone in my own fucking family.
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