Too good to be true

Have you ever felt like the stars had aligned and everything was finally going your way?

Your ego is being stroked - in a PC kind of way.

People are talking to you and about you as though your not the 'fake' you're always afraid of being found to be.

Your passions and interests are merging to create the 'dream' job.

The future is being painted in bright positive colours that call out to you.

You're dancing in the sunshine, in your prettiest dress, twirling, twirling... and then the skies open suddenly and it's raining all over your beautiful picture. Those clear, defined lines, now smudges on an old canvas - the dull picture from before becoming visible once again.

I know, it's shit.

But despite this hiccup, what is already going right for you?

Remind yourself of those things and don't allow the negative in. In may not have worked out this time round but it doesn't mean that it won't.

Get back to what you were doing and put in an extra 10%. Do it for you, to know that you mean business in everything that you do, whether you like it or not - remember?

We'll see who gets the last laugh....

Working 9 to 5

*Sigh* I'm having trouble at work, in the sense that I never want to be here.

I've never really known what I wanted to do with my life - work wise - and I'm still struggling. I used to work at a college coordinating international visits, but thought I wanted to be a Project Manager. I then got a job as a Project Manager, realised what a thankless job it is and hated every second of it so handed in my notice.

The sense of relief was amazing and I felt free to explore what else was out there. I love the freedom my boyfriend has with his day. Yeah he has to get up at god-awful times in the morning, but he gets to nap during the day. Or if the freaking sun decides to grace us with it's presence, he gets to relax in the park topping up his tan!

Last year I went to a Zumba workshop, bought for me by my boyfriend, which resulted in me obtaining an instructor's certificate. I'd always been far too scared to consider making a living from it but this time round I suddenly had the enthusiasm and gusto to potentially go for it.

Then an opportunity presented itself to me at my old company. I hadn't even finished working my notice yet, but given my feedback as to why I chose to hand in my notice (lack of training) and feedback they had received from others, I was offered the position to set up our own training department. Now, I've got absolutely NO training experience but I want to make this work. If I am passionate about one thing it's supporting the well-being of staff. I know what it's like to have work drive you to depression. Life can be one hell of a bitch at the best of times, so I want to assist with work being the place that helps pay your bills, but also stretches your mind.

So I have days when I'm all go, go, go! And then I hit a wall and all creativity, momentum, motivation disappears and suddenly all I can think about is being at home, nursing the baby my boyfriend refuses to give me at this moment in time :)

I will make something of this role. I have to. I will not be that 30 year old woman who has no idea what she wants or has nothing to show for the 18 years in work.

Powered by such a depressing goal, I'm reaching out to old colleagues who work or worked in Education, Management & Leadership for tips. It's not what you know but who, right?!

Let's get this party started.